THE BEGINNING: PART 1
Welcome, reader, to the Hall of Creatures. I doubt you care enough to learn my name, so you can call me The Founder, as that is technically what I am. Here begins the story of my adventures through the Hall of Creatures, blah blah blah, exposition exposition.
I was an intern at a top-secret science facility. Not really the coffee-fetching kind, no, it was way more mundane, like “please label these 400 vials of possibly radioactive squirrel DNA”. In fact, all the “science” there was unreasonably ambitious and stupid. I’m not sure why I even decided to work there really, or why they were openly hiring interns for a TOP SECRET SCIENCE FACILITY. That’s a plot hole if I’ve ever seen one.
It was my second week on the job, and somehow I hadn’t blown anything up yet or turned into a reptile or something. Then, of course Tuesday had to come and ruin all of that. I was just minding my own business, delivering a stack of papers titled The Implications for Brunch (don’t ask why) when I noticed something odd in Lab 19B. That’s saying something, as everything in this lab was fundamentally insane. Between two random experiments was some kind of Door. It wasn’t even attached to anything either, just standing there in the middle of the room, with a slight glowing aura. I exclaimed “huh” to no one in particular, and of course I HAD to touch it, right? That was a mistake.
I opened the door, it creaked slowly and menacingly, and saw… odd things. Stars, spaghetti, ducks wearing monocles, zombies riding chickens, and other… “wonders”. Before I could decide if I just was under-caffeinated or something, it yoinked me inside without even asking for consent, tsk tsk tsk.
When I came to my senses, I found myself in an… ugly hall. The carpet was a dirty yellow, the walls were scratched and the wallpaper was ripped, and the ceiling was pitch black. What had to be hundreds of doors populated the area, as the hall seemed to go on for… a VERY long time. But then, a strange red-and-purple Eye appeared at the end of the hallway. It spoke, and I’m not sure how, as it had no mouth.
Eye: “Greetings mortal, you have opened the Door to the Hall of Creatures. That would make you the Chosen One…. or maybe the janitor. I lost the manual.”
…And then he just disappeared before I could speak. And there begins this wacky journey, see ya next week or whatever for part 2.
TO BE CONTINUED...
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